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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24780865">I'm Nineteen and I'm on Fire</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BowlOfSouls/pseuds/BowlOfSouls'>BowlOfSouls</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Soul Eater</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 09:07:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,192</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24780865</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BowlOfSouls/pseuds/BowlOfSouls</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>One could almost compare it to a disease, but that wasn’t a pleasant way to describe it. It didn’t do it justice. Soul supposed the best way to describe it was the simplest. “I love you.” </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Maka Albarn &amp; Soul Eater Evans, Maka Albarn/Soul Eater Evans</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>103</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Chibi! Reverse Resonance Bang 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I'm Nineteen and I'm on Fire</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Reverb 2020! My wonderful partner guacamole is such a talented artist and y'all are going to LOVE her work.<br/>Without further ado, enjoy!</p><p>Guacamole: https://guacamoletrash.tumblr.com/post/621222680937578496/im-nineteen-and-im-on-fire-a-fanmix-after</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The sky was a curious shade of black, cascading around the forest like a blanket. Though dark, it was a serene place with a comfortable sort of atmosphere. It was almost something out of a book.<br/>
</p><p>“I think we should camp out for the night.” Soul spoke softly, with tired eyes and a tepid tone. The day had been long, consequently turning into an even longer night. What was supposed to be an easy mission turned out to be a wild goose chase that lasted most of the day. When they did find the kishin, they found themselves in the middle of an ambush. Numerous kishin waited for them in the forest, and all proved to be tough opponents. By the end of the fight, Soul and Maka were both exhausted.<br/>
</p><p>Maka huffed in agreement before letting the duffle bag slip from her shoulder with a thud. The nearest town wasn’t for another 10 miles, so they both agreed it would be a good idea to bring supplies. The hope, however, was that this was just an unnecessary precaution. Unfortunately, 2 am had already past and it was only getting later. There was no way they could make it to the town to rest.<br/>
</p><p>Soul helped pitch the tent while Maka dug out a small pit and started the fire. It wasn’t much, but the fire was enough to keep the both of them warm and illuminate their little camp. The forest provided more than enough kindling to keep the fire satiated long enough for the two of them to rest for a moment. They sat by the fire, basking its warmth. The air had cooled significantly since the sun dropped, but the adrenaline from the fight had kept them from noticing. Now that they had been sitting, Soul noticed Maka release a small shiver.<br/>
</p><p>“Here.” He dragged a light blanket out from the duffle bag and wrapped it around her small frame. He was met with an appreciative smile before she leaned into him.<br/>
</p><p>“You’re like a heater,” her eyes were drifting closed as she spoke. “It’s almost unnatural.”<br/>
</p><p>A chuckle escaped from his lips as he wrapped his arms around her in a warm embrace. “I feel like I’m being used, here.” A weak chortle is all he received in response as she was nearly asleep. Each breath she took became slower and more gentle as she drifted, leaving the air quiet as Soul listened to the crackling of the fire. “You could’ve slept in the nice tent I worked so hard to put up, ya know.” His remarks remained unheard as Maka continued to sleep soundly in his arms. “Not cool, Maka.” His fingers rubbed small circles in her back fondly as he pulled her closer. He let his chin rest on top of her head, each breath she took ghosting along the skin of his neck. “I wasn’t just saying those things, Maka.” He knew she wasn’t able to hear him, that each syllable simply drifted into the emptiness of the forest surrounding them. “You’re the reason I stopped running. You gave me courage.” If he were truly courageous, he’d tell her when she could listen. “You gave me the courage to laugh.” He’d tell her how she plagued his every thought. “You can be so high strung, almost to the point of annoying.” He’d tell her how hopelessly, irrevocably infatuated he was with her. “But you’re still a part of me. An annoying, wonderful part of me.” One could almost compare it to a disease, but that wasn’t a pleasant way to describe it. It didn’t do it justice. Soul supposed the best way to describe it was the simplest. “I love you.”<br/>
</p><p>He loved her with an unruly fervor. She wasn’t perfect, and he wouldn’t say she completed him, but she made him feel whole. She encouraged him to be stronger, if not for her, for himself. He couldn’t say he loved himself, but fully, but she made him accept himself for who he was. He accepted the piano, he accepted his roots, all because of her. She inspired him.<br/>
</p><p>He continued to reminisce, telling her every thought that came to mind. Tonight he was an open book, even if she couldn’t hear it. Eventually he’d say these things to her, but right now this was enough.<br/>
</p><p>Dawn was approaching, from what Soul could tell, and he didn’t get any sleep. He spent the entirety of the night telling Maka all of his thoughts, his worries, and even just random things he knew. He just talked. Admittedly, he was absolutely exhausted, but he felt freer than before. He was able to say the things he wanted to, exactly the way he wanted to say them. It was a nice practice for the real thing, he supposed.<br/>
Maka's eyes fluttered open. The sky was still dark, but a faint light tinted the sky from the east. The fore had long since died, only embers in its stead. Soul was beside her, holding her in his arms tightly. He was rubbing circles in her back still, hinting that he probably hadn’t slept at all.<br/>
</p><p>“Good morning.” She circled her arms around his torso, letting herself melt in his warmth. She almost fell back asleep, had it not been for the chaste kiss he placed to the top of her head. It was quick, so quick that she almost hadn’t noticed it. She pulled back slightly and gazed up at him curiously. His eyes were softer than normal and his face showed no signs of surprise to his own actions. If anything, she’d say he looked rather content. “Soul?” His thumb brushed across her cheek slowly before tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.<br/>
</p><p>“Mornin'. We should probably start heading out.” He went to stand, but Maka held him in his place.<br/>
</p><p>“Why did you do that? That’s not really like you.” She kept searching his face, trying to spot anything out of the ordinary. Soul liked physical affection, but he never went as far as soft kisses. It was only on the crown of her head, but still. It was definitely different for him.<br/>
</p><p>Though he held his smile, Maka noticed his eyes sadden a bit. “Tired, I guess.”<br/>
</p><p>“Can you please tell me what’s on your mind?” She didn’t want to push, but she felt like there was something being left unsaid. Something she needed to hear.<br/>
</p><p>“I’m not sure I can tell you, yet.” His tone was melancholic, but there was a hint of something else there too. Maka respected his wishes, knowing he’d tell her eventually.<br/>
</p><p>“Okay, Soul. I can wait.”<br/>
The morning air was calm and soothing. The sky was a bright, captivating blue, a nice contrast to the night they had just experienced. The trees were tall and almost ominous, but something about this place was enticing. Soul thought it was the peaceful atmosphere. It was a nice change of scenery from the desert sand and the harsh sun.<br/>
</p><p>“The walk is going to suck, but at least it’s nice here.” The meister next to him was simply breathtaking. The little bit of the sun that shone through the trees highlighted her beauty, her hair glistening like the sun itself. Her gaze was held by the scenery before them, but his was on her. His eye was caught by a decently sized cut on her cheek, no doubt from the fight. He reached out to her, cupping her cheek as gently as he could.<br/>
</p><p>He brushed the wound with his thumb, careful not to out too much pressure on it. “How didn’t I notice this?” His heart sank a little at the memory of the fight. She had taken a lot of hits from the ambush, and there were definitely going to be some nasty bruises. He knew it was a part of what they do, that it couldn’t be helped. That didn’t mean he had to like it, though.<br/>
</p><p>Maka’s hand caught his and held it to her face. “I hate it when you do that. It isn’t your fault.” He let his fingers trace along her skin for a brief moment before he pulled away and continued walking. She stood still in her place watching him as he walked. Sometimes he was a mystery to her, not letting his emotions show. She just wanted to be able to read his mind for a day, to know what he was thinking or how he was feeling. “Why can’t you just let me in?”<br/>
</p><p>It was quiet; almost so quiet that Soul would have missed it if he weren’t so focused on her already. He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to her. “What are you talking about?”<br/>
Her palms tingled and she tried to move her fingers. Sweat was coating her palms heavily and she swallowed. Suddenly her throat seemed very dry. “Whatever. It’s not like you ever listen anyhow.”<br/>
</p><p>Soul was watching her solicitously, mindful of her fight or flight response. She typically leaned towards the first option. “I’m not very good at it.” Words were always too difficult for him. It would just be easier to hide behind sarcasm and feigned irritation. “Speaking my mind. I’m actually pretty terrible at it.”<br/>
</p><p>“Okay…” She stayed still. She wasn’t actively trying to leave anymore, which was a start. “I guess I already knew that.  I’ve been around you for years but it’s still so frustrating. I feel like you don’t trust me.”<br/>
</p><p>That had to be the farthest thing from the truth. Maka was the only person Soul trusted. If it wasn’t for her, he would probably be slouching in a corner somewhere, still filled with teenage angst and a less than healthy dose of hatred. The idea of it all was honestly quite humorous, so much so that Soul found himself chuckling much to Maka’s dismay.<br/>
“It’s not funny, Soul!”<br/>
</p><p>“No.” Something stirred within him. “No, it really isn't.” He began to move towards her slowly, as if she were a deer about to run away at any moment. Each step he took was gentle and soft, careful not to move to suddenly. “Can you close your eyes for a moment?” A quizzical expression painted her features in response and he was quick to add to his request. “I just… it’ll make it easier.”<br/>
</p><p>Soul was noticeably nervous from what Maka could tell, but she trusted him. If closing her eyes was what it took for him to talk to her, she would gladly oblige. She listened as he took a deep breathe to calm his nerves. She could almost feel the words fumbling through his head as he tried to find a way to delineate his thoughts. The sound of his feet shuffling closer to her was deafening as it seemingly reverberated through the still air.<br/>
</p><p>“If words were my thing, I’d tell you that you look pretty when the sun hits your hair just right so it glistens. I’d tell you that I actually like the way your legs look, especially when you have them draped over mine on the couch. I’ve never once actually believed that you weren’t gorgeous, I’m just not good at showing others how I really feel. In fact, at this very moment every fiber of my being is telling em to run away and pretend like this never happened, because if I asked you to, I know you would.” His hand cupped her cheek and he inhaled a sharp breath. “I just can’t pretend anymore.”<br/>
</p><p>A hesitant kiss was placed on Maka’s lips. It was short lived, barely long enough for Maka to register what had just transpired. She opened her eyes as he stepped away and was met with solemn eyes. There was a thick atmosphere surrounding them, making the foot between them seem like a mile.<br/>
</p><p>“You don’t have to say anything back. I kind of sprung that on you and I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.” His slouch increased as he mumbled out the word sand his hand rubbed through his hair nervously. In a matter of seconds, it was as if he had reverted right back to preteen Soul. Maka couldn’t stand it.<br/>
</p><p>“Soul.” His gaze was still on her attentively, an agonizing look still plastered on his face. She wanted to smooth out the worried lines between his brows. “Can you do that again?” This time, it was she that stepped forward. She had always been a little more courageous than he was, always ready to address everything head on. This was no exception.<br/>
</p><p>“Are you sure?” His mouth was already inching down towards hers. “You can always walk away, Maka. You’ll still be my meister. My Maka.”<br/>
</p><p>She let her hands drape around his neck lazily as he placed his hands on her waist. “Thank you, Soul, but I’m sure.” He smiled and kissed her again.<br/>
</p><p>Maybe he hadn’t told her he loved her, but something made him believe that she understood. Besides, he would tell her eventually. All he needed was a little bit of courage, and she gave him plenty of that.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you! Please leave your thoughts below! Heck it doesn't even have to be about the story, you can just tell me your favorite fruit.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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